
Characteristics
- Finds fault with everything
- Holds idea someone should be doing something about their problems
- Will not engage in productive problem solving discussion
- Often feels powerless to change situations they complain about
- Likes to feel free from responsibility for a problem
Do's and Don'ts
Do
- Listen attentively to their complaints
- Do show them you hear them by using paraphrasing or summarizing
- State facts without comment
- Ask “How do you want this discussion to end?”
Don't
- Agree or apologize about their complaints
- Allow an accusation/defense/re-accusation pattern to develop